joshuafox:

peoplereallyannoyme:

It’s very rare I’ll let something as superficial as celebrity get to me like this. But I just don’t know how to continue. It’s 4am as I type this out into my iPhone note pad, and I may be a little drunk which is heightening this UTTER RAGE I am feeling, but I just need to vent this anger. I’ve had a lovely night up until this point. Friends, cocktails and general good times; it’s only now upon stumbling home and putting tonight’s Celebrity Big Brother on that I’m overcome with an anger I haven’t recognized prior to this. Yes it’s no surprise that the “celebrities” on CBB aren’t actually celebrities; more a selection of fame hungry once relevant fading stars looking to pay the bills, but are Channel 5 actually serious this year? There’s scraping the barrel, and then there’s Andrew fucking Stone. World famous pop icon, dancer to the stars and general A-lister? Or simply a poor man’s Louis Spence? You decide. And I imagine your answer to that is considerably different to Andrew’s. 

Before I launch into this hate fueled rant though, there’s one thing I must stress which Andrew is quite hesitate to discuss; he is not gay. Nope. He prances, he’s limp wristed, he wear’s make up, he take cock up the arse; but Andrew Stone is not gay. Now that’s out of the way, I’d like to move onto his second annoyance which sees me reaching for things to throw at the television every time he’s on screen; his hair. A cross between Rihanna and a fucking twat; Andrew has the perfect hair to match his obviously masculine exterior. A side shaved undercut bob with highlights.  Yes Andrew, you’ll definitely fit in as “one of the lads” with that atrocity. Next point; Andrew’s utter self-delusion. It’s no shock that celebrities like to delude themselves of their own self-importance; but surely they have to have had some slight important to begin with for this to happen? Oh no, not in Andrew’s case! Just kidding… he’s danced with Britney, he’s sung with Whitney, he’s an international pop sensation! And he’s chats complete and utter shite. Obviously with him being such a world famous megastar though and me being somewhat of a celebrity stalker, it’s only right I have some kind of real life encounter to share with this true sensation.

Where did I see him you ask? Selling out the O2? Getting mobbed by fans? Accosted by paparazzi? Not quite. My first meeting happened in a car park in Hull which had been designated “backstage” for a McFly show; to which I (hate myself for) shamelessly flirting back with him to prolong my time in this exclusive area before my inevitable security removal. And the second time came whilst he was opening for John and Edward in a field on the outskirts of Wigan. So showbiz, I know. And if his flamboyant yet completely heterosexual 15 minute set of stereotyped drama queen inspired prancing wasn’t the most infuriating thing I’ve ever witnessed under the category of “music” – we then had the absolute delight of staying in the same hotel as him.  Whereas most celebrities would continue with their business and interact with “fans” as and when they approached them; Andrew and his management of course pranced on over asking what we thought of his performance. Explaining everything from in-depth chats about his musical style to the big and exciting projects he has coming up. Which I’m guessing you have all realized never did come up as he’s now in Big Brother spouting the same shit. You’re also probably wondering why we didn’t just confess our hatred to him then and there? The answer is simple. It was 3am, the hotel was miles from anywhere, we were starving, and Andrew had just let his inner diva out as he explained his celebrity status to the hotel management and DEMANDED the kitchen re-opened. Which they did and as they later presented him with enough sandwiches to feed his ever growing ego …WHICH THE CUNT DIDN’T SHARE. And it’s not just us, the general public, “his fans”, that are feeling this rage following real life encounters with Andrew, but actual celebrities who have experienced actual success also. Take this tweet from Kaiser Chief’s frontman Ricky Wilson; “I was once on a flight with Andrew Stone. Even I hoped we would crash.” A selfless statement which truly summarizes the feeling any Andrew related encounter leaves you with.

Before you all get the wrong idea from this post, I am not homophobic in the slightest. I don’t care whether someone’s attracted to men, women or animal’s; as long as they’re happy, I’m happy. It’s just when discussing Andrew Stone, this rational thinking vanishes as the only person that believes Andrew Stone is straight, is Andrew Stone.

Before I end this though, I am PLEADING with you Great Britain; when the opportunity presents itself, can we all please pick up our phones and vote this person off our televisions forever? I know we’re in a recession and money is tight, but if anything was worth bankrupting yourself for; it’d be the satisfaction of knowing your life savings were spent deflating the ego of this delusional wannabe. As let’s be honest, the only thing relevant about Andrew Stone is his surname. And please don’t confuse that as some kind of reference to the non-metallic mineral matter which is rock; it’s simply because the mere sight of him creates this burning desire inside you to stone him to death.

I usually leave my hate filled rants to my second blog, but I just had to re-blog this to my followers on this one. Never has one single person filled me with such ANGER.

AFUCKINGMEN. Absolutely hate that infuriating wanker. & oh my god he just needs to come out already, he’s not fooling anyone by constantly going on about him being straight, he definitely likes it up the rear.